Once we hit forty, women only have about four taste buds left: one for vodka, one for wine, one for cheese, and one for chocolate.

quote by Gina Barreca
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World News

World News

Obama won the election
With great elation
Yet the headlines in
Norwegian newspapers were
About cheese importation

poem by Oskar Hansen
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Something tells me that the first mousetrap wasn't designed to catch mice at all, but to protect little cheese 'gems' from burglars.

Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
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Only peril can bring the French together. One can't impose unity out of the blue on a country that has 265 different kinds of cheese.

quote by Charles de Gaulle
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Slimming

Shadorma (slimming)

Low fat cheese
Tastes like rubber soles
For weight loss
I eat it
Abusing my true taste buds
And I am still fat

poem by Oskar Hansen
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Farting cartoons

If you dont watch...t.v.then change the channel.
Ask your kids they know every farting sound
these cartoons, seem to make.
South park poo's my gold I never take...lol....
wafty clouds the ordered ode rs colored vibrant masks
of chocolate truth and dare
seems to be the daily average care the joys akin..
Sitting couches comfy is no sin to bottoms up to spray the air.

Could it be there wholesome cheesy diets........

poem by anonym
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Goats

Goats are too tasty and sweet,
Their cheese seems to be teat
When a lunch has come
And a business is dumb
From never the doing the cheat.

poem by Naveed Akram
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No Streaking Today (Fun Poem 85)

We sat in a tail back
on a very hot day;
my temperature gauge began to rise.
I turned up the heater full blast
to cool the engine down a bit.
My wife sat in the passenger seat
roasting a little bit.
She said she could smell something,
probably just her cheesy feet.
I could take my clothes off.
I said no streaking today.
You would scare the living daylights
out of all the drivers around here.
She sat there and roasted a bit more,
and when I felt she was done on that side
I turned her over
so the other side could get cooked.

29 July 2007

poem by David Harris
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Cruising

I was sailing the Pacific Ocean
on the cruise ship Sea Princess.
I searched for a peanut butter sandwich,
but settled for cheese and cress.

I was approached by a Polynesian beauty
who asked me for the time,
I told her it was time to get acquainted,
so I ordered white rums and lime.

Throughout the day we drank cocktails
and nibbled on ears and necks.
We moved down to her stateroom,
which was on the lowest deck.

She explained the Polynesian customs
of friendship, love, and sex.
In the morning we went for breakfast
and ate fruit, cheese, and cress.

poem by Orlando Belo
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Life Is A Minestrone

Im dancing on the white house lawn
Sipping tea by the taj mahal at dawn
Hanging round the gardens of babylon
Minnie mouse has got it all sewn up
She gets more fan mail than the pope
She takes the mickey out of all my phobias
Like signing cheques to ward off double pneumonia
Life is a minestrone
Served up with parmesan cheese
Death is a cold lasagne
Suspended in deep freeze
Im leaning on the tower of pisa
Had an eyeful of the tower in france
Im hanging round the gardens of madison
And the seat of learning
And the flush of success
Relieves a constipated mind
Im like a gourmet in a skid row diner
A fitting menu for a dilettante
Life is a minestrone

[...] Read more

song performed by 10 Cc
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One person enjoys a piece of hard cheese, a second a spun out prayer chant, and a third a door to the street.

Yiddish proverbs
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Do you know how many calories are in butter and cheese and ice cream? Would you get your dog up in the morning for a cup of coffee and a donut?

quote by Jack LaLanne
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Maggie

I'm trying to remember your face or your voice
It's starting to be like a faded dream
I remember your hugs, You use give
hugs like you was hugging a bear
You would squeeze so tight
I remember the smell in the kitchen
When you are cooking Sunday dinner
It makes your mouth water and you
would want sample it.
I remember you use to bake these
cheese cake square desserts
that tasted like sweet cheese
I remember the crezy nick names
You had for all of you Grand Children
IF ONLY I COULD HEAR YOUR
VOICE OR SEE YOUR FACE
I WOULD PAY A MILLION BUCKS

I MISS YOU MAGGIE

poem by LaShawanda Ivey
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Stay Peaceful

...and remember this,
You can't eat all the macaroni and cheese!
Someone else may want some too.
While the pan is still warm...
Make sure your fork is ready!

What does this mean?
Who knows!
I don't even like macaroni and cheese like that!
Especially if I have to sit and wait patiently,
For it to be passed!

I can use my fork for something else,
That sits on my plate!

How someone can take spoonful after spoonful,
And not be considerate of others...
Is beyond me!

Knowing there are others watching.

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Casserole

It was a casserole of an affair

Too many vegetables to name in the file for divorce

I knew the rift would fade and die

And that all loves complete their course

It was an out of court settlement

To save the tomato its blushes

And avoid exposing the greeness of the cucumber

The potato came out on top

[the the underdog must have it's day! '

P.S The cauliflower left quietly with a slab of cheese

[...] Read more

poem by Yvette Smith
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PALMKIN LADY (Worst Rhyme)

palmkin lady
palmkin lady
tough her skinny boon
lick her chick her
chit her crazy
cheesy pass fullmoon

palmkin lady
palmkin lady
busty booby trap
sprank her plank her
pluck her cuty
cubby bowy back

browny creamy
crab her shiny
yellow gowny crack
strip off loudy
bumping beddy
triggering heatty track

[...] Read more

poem by Pranab K. Chakraborty
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But I Am Me

I'm nowhere near perfect
I still act like i am nine
I don't know where im heading
But i'm sure i'll find my way in time! !
I still trip up on my laces
I still get ice cream round my face..
I still listen to cheesy pop, when all my friends are into Drum N Base
I dance like noones watching
An sing songs way out of time
I get drunk really easily on alchopops and cheap ol wine.
But i am me and you are you...
Everyones different so please be true! ! !
Don't pretend to be something you are not, cos that wont wash
You either like me or loath me
Love me or hate me
Ditch me or date me....
You decide

But i am me.

poem by Lucy Vernezze
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For less than the cost of a Big Mac, fries and a Coke, you can buy a loaf of fresh bread and some good cheese or roast beef, which you will enjoy much more.

quote by Steve Albini
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Vegan Steven

There was a young vegan
Called Steven,
Who just would not kill for no reason,
This kid would not eat
No cheese or no meat
And he hated the foxhunting season.

poem by Benjamin Zephaniah
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Once Upon A Time

A hungry mouse was looking for cheese
Anything, fat free, blue vein, or cheddar would please,
So out of is little hole he stepped an'
Blow me down with a feather
He bumped into a lump of cheddar
Alas it was covered by the tail of a sleeping kitten
So round to its face he went where he could be bitten
Then OMG he gave the little kitten a kiss
Who intern awoke and cried 'What oh what is this,
You gave me a kiss wow from a little mouse,
This is lovely for we both live in the same house! '
Exclaimed the mouse 'May I have that little cheese under your tail'
'Of course you can my friend, let's make this a happy ending tale.

poem by Ken e Hall
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